Clear The Decks For All Steak And Less Sizzle

Gary Sato was a great volleyball coach whom I was lucky to play under for many years as a professional beach volleyball player.  He once was in the huddle and mentioned that this one player was “all sizzle, but no steak”.  How great is that before you break a huddle and head out to battle.  Anyway, I have used that analogy for so many things in my life.  When I am doing a TV job or writing a blog I often do a sizzle to steak ratio measure.  Making sure there is enough beef in the communication.   In other words let’s keep the bull to a minimum.

What I love about living on Kauai part time is I really have the opportunity to hear my own voice, and believe me, out here in the middle of the Pacific, it’s all about the steak.  I mean even if I wanted to sizzle about on the Island the locals would wonder what was wrong with me.  It’s scary to not go for the sizzle or what is popular.  Just being the social creatures we are we’re hardwired to fit in and do what everyone else is doing.  Not to mention to do what is expected of us.

Which brings me to another interesting idea-I have a dear friend named Hutch who has a big fancy job.  He was sharing with me some transitions he was going through, and about a book he was reading on leadership, the author is from Yale and said they, of course, hoped to produce leaders.  In effect in this day and age it is getting harder and harder to make, and be a leader.  Today it’s more about managers and people who can manage the sizzle factor.  Between TV, Internet, Twittering, blogging etc, one false move and the “leader” will get slammed.  Think about our poor teenagers trying to find their own voice.  They barely get to know themselves and what they feel, and think  and then all of a sudden: KA BOOM getting lit up on Facebook.  No wonder even our modern day politicians don’t really make any moves they just slide about.  I see the sizzle factor getting higher and higher in our culture and it makes me nervous.  It reminds me of a fireworks show that is bang, pow, zip, and then just a cloud of smoke.  I don’t want to live by that bench mark even if it means being un-fabulous or non popular.  I won’t lie,  the business I’m in cam be scary.
I just keep doing what I think is right for me, and try and maintain the faith that it all works out. No matter what at the end of the day, I can at least look at myself in the mirror and know that my life reflects me.

All this confident posturing I’m doing doesn’t mean I don’t get insecure, and wonder if what I’m doing will work all the time, but the alternative seems like death to me.

Which leads me to our bodies, aging and how we judge ourselves?  We have to STOP using the highest form of SIZZLE out there to tell us how we feel about ourselves.  Magazines, TV, Internet images are mostly sizzle, and no one is talking about how we get to the steak.  I guess it’s like thinking our schools should raise our kids.  Not going to happen.  We have to find it from within ourselves, and possibly utilize our immediate support group to live in that beef.  Life is about continually evolving and redefining who we are and who we want to be.  We never arrive, but have to keep polishing our stone, but in our own way.  In the end won’t it be about becoming as much of who we are as we can with each passing moment?

Who am I? What does my body look like?  Can I improve?  How old am I?  What makes me happy? What do I think? What do I like?  Who do I want to be? Don’t relinquish these questions or answers to anyone else other than yourself. Live for getting your hands on the truth, and let sizzle be for the faint hearted or at least those who want to keep wearing the lashes and spanx.

Best, Gabby

gabby
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