I admit after more than thirteen years with my husband Laird I have heard most of his “isms”. You know the jokes, child hood stories, lessons learned, and some of his life mantra’s or as I call them “Lairdisms”. I think a lot of the reason my relationship works with him is because at the end of the day I have an intense amount of respect for him, so I still keep an open ear when he is philosophizing or venting. The other day I almost fell on the floor when clear as day he said “you know I’m just trying really hard not to make other people’s problems my own”.
It wasn’t spoken in a tone of “I don’t care about other people’s problems,” it had to do more with avoiding get tangled up in other dramas. As a woman I think we are more susceptible to making other situations our own or taking things personal etc. This is what was so amazing to me about the way he said it. Simply, if something doesn’t have to do with me, and it appears to be negative I’m not going to get caught up in it. If someone is frustrated or unhappy why do we need to take that on as well? Trying to navigate through life, evolve as a human, be a good parent, speak positive words, and deal with the details of living takes up about as much energy as any of us have. Why would you want to put the drama or crap of others into that recipe as well?
I am trying; trying to bight my tongue if what I am going to say is not nice, trying to gracefully separate from circumstances that say “problem” all over them. We are living in intense times that are only getting more intense. If nothing else we need to start putting any extra energy we have into being healthy and helping our planet stay healthy. I’m not getting all hippy dippy on you, I’m saying the fact is if we don’t start taking care of ourselves, each other, and our planet we won’t have the luxury for drama. We will be too busy worrying about sickness, or trying to find clean air and water.
I applaud Laird for his clarity and for him showing me that “an expert is someone who lives a mile away” is not always true. He has also reminded me that there are far more stars in the sky then grains of sand on the earth. Do you think we are thinking too small from time to time?